The Organ

I called up to play the organ Sat night for the following day. I really love playing the piano, but I don't get to play the organ very often anymore. It used to be my church calling, but that was several years (and wards) ago. With my piano still being broken from my move (a whole other saga to tell...but, should be getting fixed after our claim processes with the movers), I have not been able to play my piano, or practice anything in months.

I got up extra early to head out to the church yesterday to get in some practice time. But, by the time I was done cleaning the nursery toys (one of my only duties as a nursery leader), there was not a lot of time to practice. I ran through the assigned hymns as quickly as I could on the piano and headed home to help load up our boys.

The result? If you know me, I always arrive 5 minutes LATE everywhere I go. This is NOT okay when you are the organist! Jared and I sped to the church, in time for me to arrive at 9:55am. Church starts at 10:00am. I ran into the building, where there was a full SILENT congregation and the bishopric looking a bit worried. I went up the organ and told bishop, "I am here! Did you want to play? Hop on up!"

I am grateful I got there before bishop started "welcoming visitors, etc" but, this did not give me ANY time to prep for the organ settings. I have not played the organ, especially this particular organ in 2+ years. So, I had completely forgotten how to set the settings, which ones allow me to have that deep base note and how loud to go. I got through two hymns and then the meeting started.

I had the bright idea to suggest that we do patriotic songs to the chorister. A great idea, right? But, again, I had not practiced ANY of those hymns~ I was just trying to provide a bit of patriotic music for this 4th of July coming up.

First hymn...I start playing for the congregation and the settings do not sound right. I try adjusting the pedals for volume, but either the notes got TOO loud or TOO soft. I couldn't figure it out...all the while, the congregation is supposed to be following me? I have forgotten how choppy the organ sounds if you don't HOLD onto those keys. My fingers are feeling nervous as I try to "glide" them back and forth without making any major mistakes.

I am feeling distracted by my kids on the front row bouncing up and down and I am trying to stay focused on those lyrics so that I don't lose my place. I had forgotten how HIGH UP the book sits on the organ, I felt like I was reading music from off of the ceiling! It was hard for me to glance down at my fingers for the keys, look back up to the music, glance back at my feet to play a few base notes (since my settings were so soft sounding, I needed that extra base help), and then back up to the music without losing my place. There is a lot of pressure when you have a hundred people or so following along!

Sacrament hymn...smooth sailing, thank goodness. No need to play an extra verse while they finish preparing the sacrament. That can always be a bit nerve wrecking b/c if you mess up, no one is singing along to cover it up. It's just you and those pipes!

Rest hymn...The Star Spangled Banner! I had NOT practiced this song EVER. I was super nervous for it and kept praying to Heavenly Father that He would help me along. I wanted this hymn to be for Him and His church service, so I just needed that extra feeling of peace as I tried my best. The congregation stood up and we sang all three verses. I was especially nervous on, "And the rockets red blaired, the bombs bursting in air!" chorus part b/c I did not want to mess up that important part! I got the chills when I heard those beautiful lyrics and the only thing missing was a gigantic flag hanging over so we could salute it:)

Last hymn...My Country 'Tis of Thee. Again, had not practiced it at all, but it was an easy one.

Overall, an enjoyable meeting. The pioneers were discussed, patriotic music sung, and the organist was not too frazzled to head off to her toddlers in nursery for the last two hours.

Update: May 2nd, 2010. It's been almost a year since I last played! My newest calling is the ward organist. I still get sweaty feet and hands when I hop up there. Practice does make perfect, but without a piano here at home, I can't get in the playing time I need! After I made it to church 5 min early, the chorister told me, "You better go through that one again" after fudging up a few sharps and flats during pre-lude. It is scary up there!

What If

Just yesterday I watched a touching story on Oprah about a mom who accidentally left her baby girl in the car where she died from heat exhaustion. The message of the story was how mom's need to step back, take a look at the blessings in our lives and slow down so that we can avoid any major accidents, etc. That could easily happen to any of us if we are too caught up in other things. I know that Isaac is usually the last one to get out of the car when we unload, and I sure hope to never be too preoccupied to forget to unbuckle that baby!

Scary experience this morning. Isaac slept well until about 4am, but when he started to cry it out (refer to earlier post)...I just put my ear plugs in so that I could sleep. I knew that he was crying on and off, but knew that if I went in there...I would just make it worse and enable him that much more. So, I left him alone.

Austin came in shortly there after to sleep with me, so I was half-awake.

By 6am, I couldn't hear him crying anymore, so I went in and checked on him. He had almost suffocated! He had his blankie wrapped all around his head, was silently sobbing and was all sweaty. I felt TERRIBLE.

What if something had happened to him and I hadn't done anything about it? My phone network wasn't working (it is now) last night, so I couldn't have been able to call 9-1-1 or anyone for help. I just imagined myself running through the neighborhood calling out for someone to call an ambulance meanwhile little Isaac could have been unconscious.

It makes me super sick to my stomach to think about the "What if?." Especially after watching that show on Oprah last night, this hit a little too close to home. I don't feel like I take any of my family members for granted (especially my kids and Jared), I am just so grateful to still
have them.

I got down on my knees and said a special thank you prayer to God that He let us have Isaac here in our home, and that He didn't decide that it was time for him to go back. I love that little baby so much. I love all of my boys. My life is centered around each of them right now.

I am committing myself to not be on the computer as much these days. I have plenty of time to be alone after they go to bed, so why not "enjoy" them during the day.

I am so so so so grateful that nothing happened to him. An attitude adjustment once again on how much I do love my boys and how lucky I am to have them in my life...

crying it out

We are back to square one...letting baby Isaac cry it out.

I slept in the guest room at the end of the house last night to avoid breaking my heart. When will he learn how to soothe himself? It's so hard hearing his little wimpers.

Put him to bed by 7pm, but woke up several times knowing that he needed me. I finally rescued him at 5:30am. Sobbing baby. Poor baby. Just wants his mama.

They are itty bitty for such a short time, why can't I just hold him and help him? I know that this is for his own good, to help teach him how to sleep...then, why is it so hard on me?

He is now 5 months old, and almost 20 lbs. He is not lacking in the nutrition and needs to be sleeping longer stretches. My chunky monkey.

Maxi Pad

I was at my sister's house helping her job hunt when I heard the dreaded sound from Isaac....the one that only babies can make and get away with in public. Yes, the juicy, wet, long, toot sound!

At this point, I unbutton his onesie as soon as I can to avoid any leakage onto his back. I am not a fan of changing his outfits more than one time a day, and we all know how far that yellow liquid can spread (and how fast). I thought I was in the clear with this dirty diaper b/c I avoided a "blowout."

I reached over to my diaper bag to find it EMPTY of diapers! I had put in 5 diapers just two days ago before church, so how could this be! I keep a fresh stack in my car, but it was at the shop getting a DVD player installed (can't leave home without one of those when you have kiddos!). So... I needed to be resourceful, and I needed to do it quickly.

What could I use? My sister is single and obviously would not keep any diapers around. There were no stores within walking distance. I didn't have an extra swimming diaper in my bag, or underwear, or duck tape, or cotton balls. Then the idea came to me: a maxi pad!

My sister fetched one for me from her bathroom and off I went in my quest of cleanliness. I wiped his bottom clean, spread that maxi pad ON TOP of the yellow madness, pulled the wings tightly around the edges of the messy diaper, and called it good.

The result? A smelly, yet clean baby bottom. The maxi pad was not absorbent enough for a good nap (he woke up with pee across his belly), but it definitely did the job until I could get back into my car to get a clean diaper back on him.

May this be the ONLY time that my son ever wears a feminine product of any type.

Thank you Ms. Maxi:)

Tongue Crib

I never sucked my thumb. I didn't suck on my fingers. I have always been aware to never chew my nails, to floss and brush daily, etc. And what do I get from all of this dental care?

My grill. A new diet. A roof ring. Backwards tongue retainer. Lisp creator.


Call it what you want. I have a new "tongue crib."

This is a picture of a tongue crib, looking at the roof of the mouth. "For our patients that thrust their tongue in a forward position, this appliance quickly redirects the tongue to a more normal swallowing position.The appliance is glued in place and will usually stop the habit in the first couple of months. However, we will need to keep the appliance in place until the permanent front teeth overlap each other." For me, the ortho said ONE FULL YEAR!!!
For the last 15 years, after getting my braces off, I have had a tongue thrust. The result? My teeth have slowly been pushing forward. Every time I swallow or when I am sleeping, my tongue is in the "resting" position. I have been well aware of my teeth protruding, and although they are straight, I do not like the way that they look. It is a cosmetic issue, but one that I wanted to fix.

I headed out to the ortho where he told me of this tongue crib that could help it out. No problem, I thought to myself. It was put in three days ago. When he first put it in , I thought I was going to gag nonstop. It feels like your tongue has been cut into two. You can't bring it forward unless your entire mouth is open wide.

I have not eaten in three days, my speech sounds like Austin Powers with a stronger lisp, I can't pronounce ANY decent Spanish words with a rolled R, and I wake up with the worse breath in the morning b/c of this retainer.

I am going to have to go in this week and get the removal kind. I feel very insecure when talking to strangers (they look at me like I am abnormal with a speech impediment), my appetite has decreased b/c it hurts to crunch on those back molars, (not to mention that I can't move my tongue to push the food around, thus the food gets stuck in the metal brackets), and more than anything....I can't communicate the way I need to!

I will always have empathy for those people who have speech, eating, or self esteem problems, b/c now I have them too.

Hip Hip Hoo-ray

Austin woke up screaming this morning at 5am. I was nursing the babe, and so I just thought, "another bad dream." I got Jared up so he could attend to his needs. Austin kept on crying, but I didn't think too much of it. I wanted to take advantage of going to the gym ALONE for once, and so I put on my running shoes and headed out the door by 5:45am.

Not 5 min into my workout, the front desk gal came by to tell me I had a phone call. I was so surprised that I literally FELL OFF of the hiking treadmill. Talk about embarrassing. I did catch my fall, but not without blushing. Jared was very nervous b/c Austin couldn't calm down and was screaming in pain with his hip.

Off we went to the Urgent Care. They were not able to do x-rays like I had hoped, and so they sent us off to the ER. Poor Austin couldn't sit, stand, lay down, etc. He would scream whenever Jared lifted him in and out of a chair. His demeanor was totally normal, which I am grateful for. He was asking for food, talking about the Dr, and wanting to be held. But, what was wrong with his hip? Or was it his leg? Was it an infection of the joint?

I wasn't quite prepared to be gone the entire day...isn't it always how it goes? I was still in my workout clothing, I hadn't brought any food for my kids, and I didn't even have a water bottle for the AZ heat.

I was very impressed with the Pediatric Unit. Red, Yellow, Blue and Green painted walls everywhere, a snack/refreshment fridge with pudding and Jell-O (which you know my boys loved), and even Jared and I had one of those pre-made gross sandwiches. After 4 hours or so, your tummy starts to rumble with hunger! They had a movie playing for the patients to watch, big comfy chairs, and Austin even got a little red pillow on his bed as a souvenir.

After taking blood tests and x-rays, the Dr found NOTHING wrong with our little "Double A." It's a relief b/c I was getting nervous that he might have some sort of cancer or dangerous infection in his joint. The Dr thinks it may have been a sprain??? Not quite sure. That was a lot of screaming and energy spent on crying for just a sprain! The biggest thing that he said was, "the difference between adults and children; when something hurts us, we just keep on using it. For children, they will stop when there is pain." Ironically, we weren't doing any physical activities the day before to cause the pain.

I am so grateful. Hip Hip Hoo-ray. Austin is in good spirits, his hip is healing just fine, and he is excited about his new bubble gum antiobiotic medicine. Wesley broke his leg at age 2, and Austin sprained his hip at age 3. What is in store for Isaac?